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When I was in the sixth grade, I traveled with my parents to Brazil. We journeyed with a small group from our church to visit missionaries we supported there. If you know Cliff Catlett, you know this about him: If you have a meal with my dad, “it’s the best meal he’s ever had,” and you are considered now his “dear” or “beautiful” friend. He’s a gem, and I am ferociously protective of him.
After a long day of travel on long and windy roads in a hot Kombi bus, the group finally landed at a Chinese restaurant in downtown Sao Paulo. My dad enthusiastically ordered a Coke to go with his meal declaring the joy of pairing a Coke with Chinese food.
The group agreed until, on the way down the curvy mountain, my dad lost his “Chinese cookies” out the small cracked window of the hot van. Our not yet Pastor at the time, Glen Cole, quipped, “You gotta love a Coke with Chinese food!” The group laughed. I was furious, and my 12-year-old self rose up with some sharp words to the man who openly mocked my father in his plight.
I learned two things that night, however. Back at the hotel, my mom taught me about “relief humor.” This is when we laugh when something not-so-great happens, but the laughter relieves psychological tension and releases nervous energy. When you have an illness like ALS or have a loved one that does, this type of humor is helpful.
Secondly, my respect for my dad deepened that night. I watched him take the ribbing wi humor. He was sick for two days but when he was back on his feet, he took good-humored pokes from the (now I understand) compassionate crew. He was steady. Calm. Sweet.
His character proved to be an enormous help to my mom as they continued to passionately pursue community and friendships. I love this sweet ode to him. Thank you, Papa.
–Tricia
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Many people have wondered exactly what Cliff does now that he has retired for the third or fourth time (we have all lost count). He applied for a job that, unfortunately, nobody else wanted, so by default, he was elected my chauffeur. Fortunately, he comes highly recommended with outstanding references; his driving record is exemplary, and his moral character is beyond reproach. What more could you ask for from a personal chauffeur, especially since we are together 24/7?
After coffee with his friends, his work day begins around 9:30 am. Our daily schedule starts with breakfast out, usually at one of Carmichael’s very finest restaurants, the Waffle Barn. Occasionally we break the routine and go downtown Sacramento to Fox and Goose or Tower Cafe. Many times our itinerary includes my meeting with friends for lunch or coffee. His job description includes not only driving me but also getting me in and out of the van safely and making sure I am settled in the restaurant or coffee shop while he patiently(?) waits off in a corner somewhere while I visit with friends. Great deal for me, not so sure about him because sometimes I throw in a shopping trip in the middle of all this.
I am very grateful, thankful, and appreciative of Cliff’s wonderful care and concern. We both know we keep busy for a reason. Because of the progression of the ALS, we are unsure how much time I have where I can be up, out, and about. Hopefully, it will be a long time. Getting up, dressed, and out of the house plays into our good mental health routine.
It is important for both of us to focus on the positive, and staying busy is a necessary ingredient. I just completed teaching a five-week class, “Parenting With Love and Logic,” for Centerpoint Community Church; I have been invited to speak at the ALS “Swanky Summer Soiree” in June and also to share my story at a Women’s Bible study in Loomis in a couple of weeks. All of this, and Cliff is my driver, care provider, and friend. I am blessed.
I cannot go anywhere without him, nor would I want to.
–Susan
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